Don't Worry, Be Happy :)

How can I even express my gratitude for what happened today? It seems impossible.
I hardly ever cry from pure happiness, but I did this morning.

Once again, just like how I did last summer, I received an email stating I had a new message in my Byu financial center. I was thinking "Well, I hope it's not another fee that I need to pay." But if it was, I knew there was not much I could do about it but pay it off, so I decided that I might as well sign into my school financial account to read the message.

There was the title: Dean of Students Enriched Environment Scholarship

I opened up the message and stared at it. It couldn't be. It absolutely couldn't be.

Dear Rachel, The Dean of Students is pleased to grant you an Enriched Environment Scholarship  as detailed below: Then the amount was listed for both semesters--full tuition. I continued staring, until I burst into tears. Let me tell you, I usually don't find myself crying over pure joy. One of my first thoughts was, How? The notice for the scholarship last year pretty much said it was a one-time deal only for that year. After the school year, the office wanted me to email them, explaining how my scholarship helped me during the school year, my experiences at Byu, lessons I have learned, and my current standing academically and financially. I was honest with everything, explaining how this last year has been very challenging academically, emotionally, physically,  socially, and financially, but how my experiences have strengthened me spiritually, making the year a wonderful experience and I wouldn't trade any of it for anything. The email explained that the scholarship is usually a one-time deal, and that my explanation would help them determine which students would receive the same scholarship for next year, and I was more than happy to help. However, I did not expect at all my response to let them change their mind about this scholarship being one-time deal. With all this in mind, I am so glad to hear I can go to school again next year. My prayers were answered. The load of worry about how to pay for everything, at  least for now, has been lifted. This upcoming school year, I am going to try to raise my Gpa a little more and gain more experience to be more eligible for private and school scholarships later down the road. After seeing and being exposed to people getting into serious debt, and I know that student loans are often considered "ok" or "an emergency," I am going to avoid it at all costs for as long as possible until I reach graduate school. In addition, I'm alright now that my disability income case was terminated. I'm fine with working a little to save up, but now I feel relieved that if I can receive financial aid, I can now pay for both tuition and rent. I still feel inadequate for receiving this scholarship from the Dean of Students, a job from them, and then the scholarship once more. I'm not bragging, but am trying to bring up a point in one of my favorite scriptures: Alma 26:12. As we live with faith and rely on the Lord's strength, even whenall seems as if it's about to crash, there is hope in each day and in the future.